Bryan's Rice-Boy Hall of Shame Vol. 6

The Herd Mentality

Ask just about any Rice-Boy why they do what they do, and one of the most popular responses you'll get is "Well, I want to make my car look more original". But then... why do they all look the same?

A Pair of Prelude "SiR"s

The two little detail boxes here show you that these cars are actually Prelude SiR's, or so their owners would like you to believe... but it is my understanding that Honda never built a Prelude SiR. Not even in Japan. Was anybody fooled?

How much do you want to bet that both of these cars are Si model Preludes and not even VTECs? After all, there are no white VTECs, and the black one got a new spoiler...

But at least their cars are more original, right? Oh wait a minute, these cars are almost identical except for the color and one has slightly nicer wheels, and the other has clear side markers...

Three of These Cars Belong Together...

... one of these cars just isn't the same...

These four cars just show how unimaginative many of these people who are trying to be "original" really are. How is it being original if your car looks the same as everyone else's once your done?

Here we have two civics EX models (one black, one white), lowered with the stock hubcaps and nothing else. We also have here three white Hondas, lowered, all with stock wheels (well, the hatchback has EX caps), lowered, and that's all. And one Civic hatchback who is afraid that someone might mistake it for a Ferrari or something so he reminds us that it is just a Civic.

I'd just like to point out right now that all four of these pictures were taken at the parking lot of the same mall on the same day. Talk about originality...

50 Pounds of Vinyl Tape

People have begged me to put this car in my Hall of Shame, and now, here it is! At least this guy is pretty original. But all that stuff is vinyl taped onto his car. It looks really horrible from close up.

This guy spent a lot of money though, on a bunch of stuff that makes his car heavy, and in the end, his car still just looks ridiculous, and it's still slow.

Look at the body kit he got. New lights and everything. But just look at all that tape! The body kit doesn't fit right. The tape... looks like tape. I wonder if he waxes his tape or something. And don't forget his ultra-cool windsheild visor.

Can You Get Off The Ground With That Wing?

Just look at the size of that thing!

Also notice his cool one-toned light cluster. Even the reverse light is red. That makes you reverse faster, I guess. And I could have sworn his car used to say "Import Showoff" and not just "Showoff" like it says now. Notice the big blank spot. It first I thought maybe this guy is involved with the Import Showoff show thing, but I guess not. It looks like the Import Showoff people got mad at him.

More vinyl tape. Ever see so much on one car?

Also on his rear bumper he has some web address. How nerdy is that!?

What's he showing off anway? It certainly isn't his performance, he only has the stock exhaust. But he obviously isn't showing off his good looking car, as ridiculous as this thing looks...

The Original Rice Computer

This is actually my computer. I was really bored so one day I put some stripes on my computer. And some other things.

Notice how the LED display shows 133 MHZ. In actuality, this computer only runs at 100 MHZ! But now it runs at 133 because it says so!

Also take note of the "Intel Inside" Pentium Processor sticker, which was stolen off a computer at Computer City. Stating the obvious makes my computer go faster... HONEST!

And even though this isn't a car, the VTEC sticker increases high end performance!


Last Modified 4/23/98.

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Disclaimer:
The term "Rice-Boy" is not meant to be a racially derogatory term. It just reflects the fact that most of these types of cars are owned by Asians and that they are all Japanese made cars. I myself am an Asian, and I still think these guys are dumb. It's not about race -- it's about attitude.