Responses of the Week

including the best of hate/great mail of the week!

This page, will (hopefully) be updated weekly, and will include some of the responses I get every week, and my responses to them. You'll be seeing hate mail, and non hate mail here! And now, for my standard response-page spiel:

I would like to take the time to reiterate some things about my opinions and such. I do not hate import cars. I do not hate Hondas. I do not think American cars are superior. Nor do I think Japanese cars are superior. Really, the Rice-Boy page has nothing to do with that argument Also, I am perfectly aware that there are some guys with Civics or other imports that are fast. The rice-boy page has nothing to do with the cars that are actually fast. Only the ones that pretend to be fast but are not.

Another thing is that you will probably notice that I have put more hate mail up here than friendly mail. This is not because I get more hate mail, like some people (mostly rice-boys) seem to think. It's just that hate mail is just so much more interesting to read! I get about one piece of hate mail from a rice boy for about every 70-80 response I get from someone who likes this page.

Updated 1 December 1999

Alright folks, it's that time again. Time for a new responses of the "week". Maybe I should just make a quarterly thing since... well actually, no, it hasn't been consistent. Oh well, whatevers. Also, to compensate for the fact it's been so long since the last update, I'm going to make this one longer than usual!

Also, as usual, I print less great mail than I do hate mail. That is because hate mail is much more fun to read, not because I get more hate mail than great mail. In fact, one of the reasons why Responses of the Week gets updated so rarely is because I don't receive any hate mail! Since the last Responses of the Week update, I have received a total of 16 hate mails.

That's out of a total of 1,700 messages. Yes. Out of 1,700 messages received since August, the number of hate mails I received can be counted on fingers and toes. Anybody who wants to talk about how much people hate me for running this site should recheck those numbers.

Previous Weeks:

24 August 1999 | 7 June 1999 | 29 July 1999
9 April 1999 | 5 February 1999 | 21 December 1998
3 December 1998 | 25 November 1998 | 4 August 1998

Hate Mail of the Week

For those of you who don't know, this month, Bryan's Rice-Boy Page was featured in Sport Compact Car magazine. Thankfully, this has brought in more hate mail to me, which is good because everyone knows that hate mail is so much more fun to read than great mail!

So anyway, this first one is a few months old. My favorite part is the last sentance:


you are a real shitty asian. why do you pretend to be a "i can see it from all these other point of views" and "american car have some better shit, and japanese cars have these other better shit"... why don't you just say what you really want to say. no way will you be able to please everybody, just say what you hate. those who agree, agrees and does who hates your fucking guts like us, will.

why can't you just say you hate the fucking rice-boys, and you don't want to be a hypocrite and that's why you don't want to mess with your car, because you might become a rice boy yourself. is that the only reason why you dont' want to modify your car... cause you scared that you might become a rice boy yourself if you didn't leave your car in its stock condition.

and why do you know and use so much stats about cars. unless you have nothing else better to do then read and study every fucking car magazine out there, they're ain't no one that will know every shit about cars.

and last of all, you a little pussy... and don't know shit. telling what you drive ain't gonna get your car all scratched up... you'll be lucky if you're able to get out of the hospital bed. hearing all your shit, has even pissed me off to that point of doing harm, i believe there are many other out there who would feel the same way. if we can't beat you with words, we'll just beat the shit out of you.

i want this to be posted on your website and i want to hear your fucking respond, there's no point in arguing back logically either little pussy.

No point in arguing back logically? Then how am I supposed to respond? Well I guess there are two ways... I could say "oh yeah? Bring it on bitch! Me and my crew will fuck you up so bad you won't even remember what happened to you. I'll kick your ass. You are stupid. You suck. A monkey is your uncle."

Or I could say... "Chewbacca is a Wookie. But he's hanging out with the Ewoks. That doesn't make sense. Therefore, you don't make sense either".

Oh yeah, his e-mail was titled "DELETE IT PUSSY, I KNOW YOU WILL". But I didn't.


Now, this next one comes from yet another guy who has no idea what this site is about.

You have no clue as to what you are talking about!! Sure, i know there are alot of people who "junk" a car up by "hacking" the factory springs. But, the ones of us who DO drive nice cars, don't claim the ones who screw the car scene up. I myself DO drive a 1999 Honda Civic SI. It does truly have the VTEC engine, and is lowered properly with properly aligned wheels using camber correction kits. Don't be so quick to judge everyone just at the expense of a few. To me, I think JEALOUSY is the key reason for your website. Don't be jealous of people! It does nothing but get people to talking about what a whiny little bitch you are.

That's great that you drive a 1999 Honda Civic Si with a real VTEC engine and is lowered properly with proper alignment. This page isn't about you. Don't be too quick to judge my site before you even know what it is about.

I think maybe you are the one that has a problem with jealousy. Or some sort of inferiority complex. Why else would you jump to all these conclusions and be so sure of them that you would write to me about them without really checking out to see what my site is about? I LOVE IMPORT CARS, I don't know how many times I have to say that!

Here is another quick one from a different guy that is along the same vein:

that is a pretty stereotypical comic book, just because some fools don't know what they're doing, doesn't mean that we all don't, I have a 96 honda civic that runs the 1/4 in 13's with out NOS, I built it myself, my friends and I do this shit for a living pretty much.

Here is a direct quote of the very first sentance of my "What Is Rice-Boy" page. "Rice-Boy is a stereotype." It's even bold like that on the original page. You should try reading it some time. Just because some fools think that every import is slow doesn't mean that I do too.


Here's one of those great ones that is just like the ones from the old days:

Riceboys, what kind of shit is that you ignorant stupid fuck! Your just a fucken white boy who ain't shit and likes it in the ass. Just because people like to fix up their cars, either by making it look better or by performing better, you stereo type them. Fuck your pecker wood bitch ass whos jealous that people are driving imports. Fucken little bitch. Go suck your Daddys dick before your sister does, bitch. Don't have to be a hater motha fucka!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And this guy is telling me that I "don't have to be a hater"???


My message is simple. If people want to spend there hard earned money on something which they have a great interest and passion for, it is there choice. What the fuck has it got to do with you. Whats the matter, want to recapture your youth?

Recapture my youth? Uh-oh. I'm only 22 and I've already hit my mid-life crisis!!

And by the way, my message is simple. If I've spent my hard earned money (and time) on something which I have a great interest and passion for (like this page), and that is my choice, what the fuck has it got to do with you? What's the matter? Want to recapture your youth?


Youre a fag. You got no idea what you talking about.

I can see why you would think that I have no idea what I'm talking about. I know it must be hard to believe me when all your life you thought that Nology Hot-Wires were getting you 15 extra horsepower because that is what it says on the box.

I WAS DROPPED ON MY HEAD AS A CHILD and other stories about me that I never knew about

I'm gonna break this one up, since this one actually tries to make some points.

Dear Bryan,

It is so very sad, I read your page as an avid import enthusiast and I find that I cannot help but to feel bad for you while I laugh at your opinions of the current import or "rice-boy"scene. The fact of the matter is Bryan, that I can see right through you.

Uh-oh. It's another one of those guys who know everything about me...

For one you leave yourself wide open for critisism by first off creating an over elaborate web page that deals with nothing but you ragging on white trash imports. Its one thing to critique a car that is worth something, but you kick them while their down by tearing down their hopes of one day owning a racy import.

Over-elaborate web page? Click HERE if you wanna see what an over-elaborate web page looks like. Cuz this ain't it! And I really don't think I'm tearing anybody's hopes down.

Wow, maybe you should consider the fact that some of them cant help what kind of money they bring in? Due to the facts stated above it is easy to see that you are a total loser, you find a brief security in bashing other peoples cars (plus it must take an exorbanent amount of time to create such a page, I AM SURE YOU WORK VERY HARD)!

Sure I consider that fact. But just because you don't have any money doesn't mean you have to have bad taste. I don't know what exorbanent means (and neither does the Oxford English Dictionary), but I do know that if you are criticizing my page, it must mean that it is worth something, otherwise according to you, you'd be kicking me while I'm down, and tearing down my hopes of one day running a real website. And it would also make it easy to see that you are a total loser, due to the facts stated above.

By the way you respond in such a offensive manner to your "hate mail" section just points out your raving stupidity. You respond in such a fashion as that the e-mails actually offend you when they state the kind of car they drive, thus leading me to believe the you own a P.O.S..

How does it follow that because somebody tells me what they drive, that I drive a P.O.S.? And I get offended when they tell me what kind of car they have? I didn't know that, but thank you for letting me know.

You are clearly hipocritical when you say that you have no problems with imports and that you think of domestics with the same respect, if this was true why would you make a page that bashes on slow imports.

Because it is true. Just because I bash on slow imports (that are owned by people who think they are fast), doesn't mean that I have to hate all imports.

And anyway, I put my money where my mouth is. I have never in my entire life owned a domestic car, nor have I had any desire to own one. If I really hated imports and loved domestics (as you seem to suggest), why wouldn't I buy domestic cars?

I can just see you Bryan, (probably 4-6 years ago) just turning 16 and having your heart set on a new acura, but instead your parents come home with a new Metro a nice and shining. You cry and cry, and cry and cry, and cry and cry, but then you decide to make the best of the situation (your not stupid), you add custom 16'' wheels to the car along with a five inch tip and a green racing stripe to match the purple. Finally you cut the spring two inches and now your ride is dope, correct?

Where are you reading this from? The Max Boost comic strip? Because it certainly isn't a page out of my life. When I was 16, I didn't want a new Acura, everybody in the entire county had a new Acura. Now that I am 22, I still don't want a new Acura. I've never purchased aftermarket wheels for any car that I've ever owned, and I've n ever lowered any car that I've ever owned.

Yes it is, until you pull up to the line next to a GSR who proceeds to defeat you easily despite killing it off the line and missing second and third gear. You are forever crushed and have found an alien insecurity in your car, instead of selling the bucket for say a civic (or something with potential), you find temporary joy in crushing the lack of style found in a small percent of todays popular imports. This is why I proceed to say that it is sad to see such an elaborate homepage that rips on cars of a higher level then your own.

That really was a touching story, but nothing like the reality of the situation. You don't know what kind of car I have, and even if I told you what it was, you wouldn't believe it. So go ahead, and believe your little story about me, because it's actually more interesting than the real thing.

If you could back up your own ride, then you would state the make/model of it without shame but you neglect to do so, leading all the readers (including myself) to believe that you were dropped on your head as a child.

I can see where the connection between not mentioning my car and being ashamed of my car is... but where is the connection between not mentioning my car and being dropped on my head as a child? Maybe I was dropped on my head... I do have a scar, right above my left temple... hmm....

I could go on, but I guess it isnt worth the time, you will probably just respond telling me how I am a "rice-boy" and how I am sticking up for the crappy cars seen on your page.

Please respond because I would love to shove even more into your face.

You don't go on because it isn't worth the time, but you want me to respond because you would love to shove even more into my face. Hmmmm.

I don't think I can even try to really respond. I mean, you are so right on. Everything you said was exactly like my life, down to the whole Geo Metro thing with the 16" wheels.

My Rides:
- 93 TwinTurbo full race rotary RX-7 currently running high tens.
-Daily driven 98 Honda Civic EX with a B18C1 and a Drag Gen III hybrid turbo, currently running low 12's (on street tires)

Good thing you told me what kind of car you drive, cuz for a second there, I thought you were dropped on your head as a baby.

I have hyperlinked your site to such publishers as Super Street and Import Tuner, maybe they can come up with a new section in their rags called "Lame Racers", I am sure I can work something out.

Good for you. By the way, did you know that Super Street already knows about my site? Would you believe that they actually published a link with screen shots, all the way back in late 1997/early 1998? It was either December 1997 or January 1998. In the "Cyber Street" section, not the "Lame Racers" section.

Did you know that Max Speed published a link to my site in their August 1999 issue, again, not in the "Lame Racers" section, but on their list of the "Best Auto Enthusiast Sites"? "It'll have you rolling on the floor, or steaming mad", they said. I guess we know which category you fall into.

Did you also know that Sport Compact Car also featured my website in their December 1999 issue (or whatever month it is that is about to go off the news stand)? Also not in the "Lame Racers" section.

You don't need to work anything out for me. And what do you mean you can work something out? Are you some head of publishing at Peterson or something?

MORE STORIES FROM BRYAN'S CHILDHOOD that he never knew happened

Alright man, first of all, what kind of loser would spend the time to put up a site using a made up nickname for people like yourself looking for attention. Obviously you have/had no friends in your childhood and probably a single mother and CRAVE attention. Only, the fact is, you can't get it in real life. So, you drive around (undoubtedly in a shitty car) looking for 'souped up' cars to make fun of. You say that these people are trying to look FAST, why arn't they just trying to look better, which you have stated over and over again that you have no problem with.

Why does everyone think that this site exists out of jealousy? Is it because they are still living with the mind of an 8 year old boy where everything is motivated by jealousy? Why is it that they can't comprehend that there are other reasons someone would do something like this?

If you have such knowledge about the car industry, USE IT.

I did. A prominent import car magazine actually published a feature article that I wrote. But they don't want me to tell you who they are because they don't think the world is ready to know that I write for the "competition" so to speak. I don't thinkt he world is ready either.

Don't spend time on the internet trying to get people who know less about cars to suck your dick. I personally admit I know very little about cars.

Hey now, an endless supply of people sucking your dick doesn't sound like such a bad idea...

But, I am wholey unimpressed with your site as are the 20 other people who sent me this url...

Oh know, what am I going to do? 20 of your friends don't like my page. That's almost 8/10th of one percent of my daily traffic!! My popularity is definitely going downhill!


Again, another guy who thinks I am jealous... who makes it painfully clear that he is, himself, a riceboy.


Firstly, get a life instead of posting pictures of other peoples cars. Secondly, it's obviously a jealousy site and you not telling us what you drive because you probably drive nothing or a shitbox. You stay you are not trying to put Japanese cars down but I don't see you putting too many Domestics on. Another thing, if you are going to be making fun of Civic engines when you're probably comparing it to Camaros and shit then those are two totally different classes of cars and power. If people want to sit there throwing on SiR stickers and Type-R stickers then let them. Fine, I agree with you that it's really dumb but if they want it, let them. You don't have to drive it, you don't have to stare at it. Stop stereotyping against our little Hondas because I could GUARANTEE you that my little Honda will blow the shit out of your and/or any of your friends cars so until the day comes when all Japanese cars can be beat by whatever you and your little "boys" like...then shut up and get a life.

You'd never believe it if I told you I drive a japanese car anyway, so I don't suppose there is any point in trying to convince you.

Great Mail of the Week

This first great mail comes from a person at the Department of Sociology (who also happens to be Asian) at a particular University of California campus. If that doesn't add a bit of validity to my site, I don't know what will...

First of all, excellent page. I find your page not only hysterical, but also biting and incisive. I could not agree more with the "identity crisis" notion. Overall, Asians (especially second generation) do suffer from the "lack of self" syndrome, which is reflected in a multitude of ways.

And no, I do not think what you are doing is hurtful towards Asians in this country. On the contrary, I appreciate you criticisms. I am an Asian and I think your comments are justified.

The fact is, I think you are chastisizing the stupidity floating out there, and I absolutely agree. Well-balanced machines are the truly admirable inventions, not huge wings and ridiculous body works.

Sometimes I burst into laughter when I see these "signs of low intelligence and minimum intellectual quality" on the road. In fact, I would qualify these cars as road hazards.

Anyway, keep up the good work and have fun.

And chicks dig me too, like this one from LA:

hi bryan,

when i first heard about your web- page address, which was recommended by a white co- worker of mine, I thought it was about that phenomenon when Asian girl goes out with White boy; hence Rice- boy (because my white co- worker tries to insult me by saying " I am glad white women go out with me, so that I do not have to lower myself to date an asian girl.") He is joking actually, even though it probably sounds like he is an asshole.

I read your entire web page thoroughly and had to e mail you. I recently moved to Los Angles 2 years ago and know exactly what you are talking about. What are these people trying to prove? They are actually drawing more attention to what they don't have by "advertising" what they wish they could obtain.

I think you are a pretty cool guy with a great sense of humor; I was rolling on the floor reading your responses from the pathetic Rice Boys.

I am glad this site was initiated by an Asian bcs every time I see one of those eyesights on the 405 or the 10 or the 110, it seems that there is an Asian behind the wheel and this further perpetuates the myth that Asian males are lame, pathetic, and stupid, when actually the majority of them are not. I do not know what type of woman would even date or get into one of these hideous monsters.

These rice boys should just save their money they are spending on all these ridiculous gadgets on something really useful.

I am sure you get tons of e mail, but I think it would be great to get a response from you bcs I think it would be cool to email you since you seem to have similar humor and intelligence as me; well, I can't say, since you never disclosed your SAT score in the website (just kidding). by the way, it is only fair to tell you that I have graduated from college and medical school and am 28 years old (I know at least that about you; so i think it is fair to tell you this).

Now that the world knows that your old car was volkwagon, i will tell you that i drive 93 honda accord EX with nothing special except a bunch of scratches on the exterior (especially truck and hood and side where key goes) from being careless since I see my car NOT as an extension of me, but merely as a means to get from here to there and back.

And finally, from the design team at Ford Motor Company...


You've done us here at Ford Motor Company's "Skunk Works" proud. In fact when I get through wiping the tears of laughter from my eyes, I plan to sent your pages all over the design community here. You've really made our day.

Congrats on a marvelously humerous site.

Doesn't get much better than that, does it?

Back to the Responses Page.

Last Modified 12/1/1999

Disclaimer: The responses published here may have been edited for length and/or content. The return addresses of those who respond are kept secret unless I am otherwise instructed.